A web-page, a blog!
What in the world am I doing here? exposing my belly to a world of anonymous web-surfers.. I feel the illumination of avenues within; inconsistencies, scattered thoughts, twisted considerations – plus many wide-ranging shortcomings; I sense vulnerability. I suppose this too will depend on exactly how ‘fully’ one may express themselves – but then…. who set the standard on what folks are allowed to challenge themselves with?
Rolling through these rambling thoughts are the words ‘conformity,’ ‘ethics,’ conscientiousness, ‘morals.’ Each indeed fine and conducive to a finer society (much like a cultivated field yields more product) – yet within it all, it has to be possible that some become weary of the encumbrance.
Early in our lives we are directed to ‘rules’ and constraints which are meant to ‘guide’ us through societies corridors; into conformity. There is a period in our 20’s that some (as I) experience the ‘hooray-for-today‘ syndrome; fun it was. I think we all make a few mental notes about the times before moving on to develop a skill somewhere within those years. In hindsight, the most successful of my acquaintances directed their livelihood toward their interests; into careers. Generally, I have accepted that lives develop through happenstance, luck, or plain good fortune – having a resilient attitude helps.
So where am I going with this?
I suppose at fifty I am reflecting to some extent – it’s something that a person at fifty (now plus) has earned the right to do – yes, like even wearing a ‘speedo’ in the summer when no one is around – it might not be pretty, but its comfortable and ‘dammit its hot out there!
Now don’t get me wrong – generally I follow the rules and conform, but I hold no hesitation to alter a rule if it makes real-time sense (and I do) – like sitting for a ‘stuck’ red light in the middle of the night when no other vehicles are within miles of the intersection……. so I move on; so am I a rebel, misfit, or just open-minded?
It’s 2008, and somehow this is a basis of a ‘weblog’ (of which I am unfamiliar with), Now where to go from here?
As close as I can get is the reasoning behind ‘bacshortly;’ the name of my 20-foot center console (boat). Its just hard to think that I have to remain in one place – tethered to a dock – What good is the boat? I don’t want to go alone but I really don’t like the process of having to explain or ask. For me, explaining why takes the soul out of the ride. Explaining creates or defines a reason thus removing any spontaneity – which to me is a fuel of interest. ‘Asking’ at times leads to another asking others (and then waiting for those to respond) and within the effort of that process it becomes ‘their’ trip and not the intended ‘ride.’ Explaining or asking changes the timing, the desire, and the complexion of the ride completely – maybe I just like to ride.
The above process is similar to pulling up behind one – or five cars at a red-light, if I have a choice I’ll take the less crowded lane (fewer folks to make a decision when the light turns green) – simplicity.
Simple independent freedoms while respecting the realm of cultural and natural wonders that surround us. During our brief earth-experience we each have the opportunity to gain a first-hand perception of what interests us; some find it difficult to understand why another would care to (example) float/raft down the Mississippi River – I can’t answer that completely, even after doing it….. With some things, my desire is fertilized when directly discouraged by another. If the negative reason is unclear; then I just might want my own clarity.
I once heard the statement that: “Our lives are but a mist droplet in the ocean of time.“ The human life-span in proper perspective; so with that I am inclined to say, “Why Not?”
– In the meantime; I’ll be “BacShortly!”